Highlights of 2017

Sliding in just under the buzzer, I’m here to carry on our tradition where I tell you everything I liked from the past twelve months and then make you a couple of false promises about posts I am going to deliver in the new year. 2017 has been wild, and it continues to do the most even as we approach the last seconds of this hellish ride, but on the bright side it also brought quite a few great film, game, and television show releases. I’d like to highlight a few that stick out in my mind as well as revisit some of my previous plans for what to watch, read, and play. So without further ado, let’s get to the good stuff. Since we’re all (web) family here, I know this goes without saying, but just in case anyone accidentally wandered onto this blog while looking for vegan cheesecake recipes or something, there will be spoilers in this post!

In my past two wrap up posts, I’ve made a list of things I was excited to check out the coming year. This year, I wanted to watch The Lego Batman Movie (I didn’t) and Big Little Lies (I did!), and play Horizon Zero Dawn (nope) and Mass Effect Andromeda (yes!). Although Mass Effect Andromeda did not make my 2017 list, I really enjoyed it. (Take that virtually everyone else who played, bought, or heard about that game!) I also acquired a PS4 this year, which was exciting, but I just set it up today so my opinion on Horizon Zero Dawn is still forthcoming. While I only had a 50% completion rate for my 2016 media consumption resolutions, I did read, watch, and play a LOT of great things this year, so let’s move on to my favorites. As usual, I picked a totally arbitrary number of them and they are not listed in any particular order.

one_day_at_a_time_still

One Day at a Time
This was a show I had never heard of and had no expectations for until it came up in my Netflix queue. I had no idea that it was (at least loosely) based on a 1970s sitcom of the same name about a divorced single mom, her children, and the building superintendent. If that description isn’t selling you, I won’t hold it against you, but I urge you to give this show a chance. Whether you loved the original or you usually pass on sitcoms, I think you will be pleasantly surprised by this show. Centering on a multigenerational Cuban-American family, the show grapples with race, ethnicity, and culture in refreshing ways that I imagine the previous iteration did not. Much of the first season focuses on Elena, who is turning fifteen and planning her quinceanera. The lead up to the party sets the stage for one of the most cathartic and gracefully-done coming out storylines I have seen in modern television. While the show pulls no punches when it comes to cheesy sitcom tropes or ~big emotional moments~, the entire cast does an amazing job of bringing humanity and nuance to their roles and the writers choose to spend just the right amount of time on tenderness and silliness. I could say more, but I’d rather you stop reading this and go watch it immediately. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, and you’ll have that damn catchy theme song in your head for the next two weeks.

get out

Get Out
First of all, just in case anyone has heard the contrary, this is a horror film a la Rosemary’s Baby or The Stepford Wives. For some reason people keep calling it a comedy (internalized racism is not a good look y’all), but Jordan Peele’s directorial debut is a terrifyingly realistic story about the way white supremacy robs black people of their bodily autonomy and then tells them that’s not happening at all and implying anything of the sort would be ridiculous. Even though I always include spoiler warnings in these posts, I honestly don’t want to say too much about how exactly the movie navigates themes of family, power, heritage, and relationships because the pacing and tone as the story unfurls adds to the artistry. I will just say that there are layers upon layers of symbolism in this movie that contribute to its impact, so if you haven’t yet watched it, you’re gonna want to set aside some time to talk about it afterwards, and probably also read a bunch of reviews, trivia, and fan theories.

the shape of water

The Shape of Water
When the credits rolled on this film, it felt like a fist unclenching around my heart. This movie really got me! Not only is it beautifully shot, the actors are also terrific, especially the leads Sally Hawkins and Doug Jones (the latter of whom is a mime and played Billy in Hocus Pocus, so he’s generally a cool and talented dude). Michael Shannon is wonderful as always, Richard Jenkins manages not just to hold his own but to charm us despite his subplot wandering away from the main action of the film, and Octavia Spencer is a gem whenever she is onscreen, which is not nearly enough! Guillermo del Toro somehow mixes horror, romance, Cold War anxiety, and magical realism into a touching fairy tale that I think I like more than Pan’s Labyrinth (please don’t yell at me!). The aesthetics are out of this world, but like Get Out, there is also a loving attention to detail in terms of symbolism and theme. For example, Elisa’s scars are subtle enough that you forget them as the film goes on, but they gain importance when the story comes to a close and Elisa realizes her destiny to return to the water. TLDR: the fishman/human sexy times did not put me off.

prey

Prey
Sticking with our theme of remakes that outdid their source material, an update of the bizarre 2006 first person shooter Prey is surprisingly my standout video game of the year. The 2017 take keeps little from the original, but holds on to what worked, like periods of variable gravity and a plot that centers on familial relationships. I was incredibly impressed with the game’s ability to weave exploration storytelling in the vein of Bioshock or even Gone Home with the stealth gameplay that made the Dishonored games so unique. And as if that wasn’t enough, they also set the story in space so…yeah, I obviously loved it. The introductory scenes masterfully use and subvert player expectations for in-game tutorials (which also made for a great demo that I’m guessing hooked quite a few people—I decided to buy the game after watching only about one minute of let’s play footage). You encounter few living non-playable characters, but everyone you meet or learn about feels fleshed out, as does the space station you spend most of your time on, Talos I. Players have a lot of freedom in Prey, and I was both surprised and satisfied by the numerous ways the story could wrap up.

coco

Coco
Last year, a Disney animated feature made my list, and this year they’ve done it again! Apparently, I was really into aesthetic detail in 2017, but Coco is worth watching multiple times if only to notice the incredible work that went into creating the Land of the Dead. You could spend an entire viewing just looking for the skull motifs (and I did). But beyond how pretty the film is, it took cues from Moana’s success and centered Latinx writers, actors, and artists in its story that draws heavily from Mexican culture and folklore, which is what made it internationally successful. Like One Day at a Time, the film focuses on a multigenerational family and the way the members influence one another. Anthony Gonzalez hits it out of the park in what better be a breakout role for him, and the music feels at once familiar and delightfully new. My favorites are “Un Poco Loco” and the sad rendition of “Remember Me” (you’ll know it when you cry over it). Despite having to walk out of the theater with tear-streaks down my face, and sit through the now infamous Frozen short, I am really glad I saw this movie.

As usual, I’ve been really wordy, but I do also want to share some honorable mentions including Logan (an amazing film on its own or for comic fans), Blade Runner 2049 (if you liked the original, you’re gonna like this), Thor: Ragnarok (a feel-good movie following in the footsteps of the first Guardians of the Galaxy), The Disaster Artist, The Florida Project (you will cry), The Big Sick, Molly’s Game (Jessica Chastain is a goddess), Mindhunter, and a ton of other things I’m forgetting to mention right now.

And we can’t forget what I missed in 2017/my anticipated releases of 2018:

  • Call Me By Your Name – As soon as the Sufjan Stevens music started playing in the trailer I knew this movie was for me.
  • I, Tonya – I have to see this, if only because I’ve watched the trailer in theaters so many times that I now have it memorized. Regardless of audience makeup, everyone always laughs when the parrot pecks Allison Janney’s neck.
  • Wolfenstein II – I can’t let the video game cultural zeitgeist leave me behind again!
  • Horizon Zero Dawn – See above. Also, I love Ashly Burch.
  • A Wrinkle in Time – This was my favorite book growing up and Oprah Winfrey is in this movie, two great omens for this film.

All right, that does it for my annual media highlights. Hard to believe another year has come and gone, especially since 2017 has felt more like thirty years. Nonetheless, whether as a form of resistance or a palette cleanser, I wish us all an inspiring 2018 full of art and culture that makes us think and drives us forward. And as always, thank you for reading!

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Highlights of 2015

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After a lengthy and unplanned, but personally productive hiatus (slogged through graduate school applications and played a LOT of Fallout), I am back to wrap up 2015 and put a bow on it. This year saw the release of a number of highly-anticipated games, films, books, and television shows as well as plenty of surprise hits and a few disappointments. As just one person with highly subjective opinions, I will not be attempting any kind of top ten list or ranking system. There are so many wonderful pieces of media out there that it would be absurd for me to even pretend I could evaluate them all. But I am a big fan of taking time to look back and wallow in nostalgia, so I decided to talk about some of my personal highlights of 2015 as they relate to nerd culture and this blog.

In no particular order, here were some of my favorite moments of the past year:

Master of None
While not sci-fi, fantasy, or fairytale, Aziz Ansari’s single-camera sitcom about the experience of Dev, an Indian American actor in New York City, has plenty to offer for film-nerds and pop culture connoisseurs. The cinematography and soundtrack call back to 1970s American films, and the scripts/dialogue take some cues from Richard Linklater (whom I love), but Aziz Ansari’s contemporary content, diverse casting, and willingness to address social issues help the show feel fresh. Each episode focuses on a different ‘topic’ ranging from family relationships to racism to sexism to long-term romantic relationships, and each except the last two are directed by a different person. The show is consistently funny throughout its first season and its surprising and somewhat risky finale only makes me more excited to see where it goes from here.

Life is Strange
Since this blog was inactive until midway through Life is Strange’s episodic release, I was only really able to talk about episode 5 here so far, and what I did say about it was highly critical. But this was easily my favorite game of 2015 if only because of the emotional impact it had on me. Although I’d played Remember Me, Dontnod and Life is Strange weren’t really on my radar in January, a friend recommended this game to me and I was immediately hooked. The sci-fi premise, artistically rendered environments, and well-curated soundtrack drew me in but it was the authenticity of the Chloe and Max, and the nuanced performances by their voice actors Ashly Burch and Hannah Telle, that kept me hooked. While the pacing, puzzles, and dialogue missed the mark at times, moments like breaking into the school and going for a swim with Chloe or playing detective in her room were a pleasure to play. For all its eccentricities and missteps, Life is Strange was one of the most compelling games of 2015, as its passionate fans who spent months speculating, theorizing, and creating art and follow-up projects can attest to.

SXSW Gaming Expo
This was my second year attending the SXSW Gaming Expo in Austin and it was just as entertaining and content-packed this time as in 2014. The indie game corner is my favorite portion, but the panels were interesting and the table-top area is really fun; they’ll teach you games like Magic the Gathering if you’re a first-timer or you can play competitively if you’re experienced. You can try Oculus Rift/VR if you haven’t had a chance, and explore exhibits of older game and computer technology. I almost didn’t want to mention the event here since it is one of the only Austin-based festival activities that isn’t horrendously crowded, one of the coolest conferences/expos/game things I’ve attended, and totally free, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge it as one of my favorite parts of 2015. Plus, in case I haven’t mentioned it 12,000 times, I met Felicia Day!!!

The Martian
I have not read Andy Weir’s novel of the same name, and took my sweet time to see this movie, but I am so glad I did. I was less than impressed by both Interstellar and Gravity, but this film has earned a place in my list of favorite space movies. While the decision to cast non-asian actors in the roles of Vincent Kapoor and Mindy Park was very disappointing to me, and the tale of the sympathetic white man who the world saves/who saves the world has certainly already been told, The Martian was an engaging story with a diverse cast that emphasized the power of humanity to come together and use our knowledge and compassion to address incredibly complex issues, and that was something I appreciated. Rather than feeling dumbed down, sensationalized, or derailed by seemingly shoe-horned romances (although it does contain one of these), the film felt like it trusted and respected its audience. And Jessica Chastain as Commander Lewis is probably as close as I’ll ever get to seeing FemShep on the big screen.

Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens
Speaking of space movies, the latest installment in the Star Wars saga was quite a satisfying one. While talking with people about this film before its release, I got the feeling that each of us was holding our breath, hoping that we wouldn’t be disappointed. Upon leaving the theater after watching the movie, I imagined a collective sigh of relief as we all realized J. J. Abrams actually did a really great job of rooting this film in the Star Wars tradition while opening up room for new chapters of the story to unfold. Nothing about the movie particularly surprised me, from the climactic battle to the binary of good and evil to who lived and who died, but it was quite refreshing to see beneath the Storm Trooper helmet to a black man, and to watch a woman inherit the Jedi legacy. I’m really looking forward to seeing where the story heads, and now that we’ve established that Star Wars can handle sequels and we can handle them, to the surprises I hope Episodes VIII and IX will bring.

And of course, I haven’t even mentioned the indie PC game Her Story (which I’ve written about pretty extensively on this blog), the choice-based horror for PS4 Until Dawn, the lovely Adventure Time mini-series Stakes, or the countless other 2015 productions that deserve a place on a highlights list.

There are also quite a few things from this year that I haven’t gotten to check out yet and am really looking forward to, like:

  • Tales from the Borderlands
  • Rise of the Tomb Raider
  • Assassin’s Creed Syndicate
  • It Follows
  • Carol
  • Sicario
  • Orphan Black Season 3

While I’d say we’re ending 2015 on quite a high note, I have a lot of catching up to do without even beginning to touch on all that next year will bring, so don’t be surprised if things stay a little quiet around here through the winter. The blog remains a priority of mine and I hope you guys will stick around as we continue reading, playing, and watching in 2016.

As always, thanks for reading! Your comments are welcome below. Happy holidays!

Review: You’re Never Weird on the Internet (Almost)

With the dawn of the internet, a new school of celebrity has risen, and many of the most popular personalities you’ve never heard of do most or all of their work on YouTube. One of these people is Felicia Day, an actress, writer, producer, and self-identified ‘situationally famous’ nerd. In her new memoir, Day writes about being home-schooled, her college career as a violin and math prodigy, her prolific commercial acting career, and the rise of her internet fame beginning with her webseries The Guild.

youreneverweird

Day’s goofy tone translates well from screen to page and it’s fun to see behind the curtain of her online empire. I am often skeptical of celebrities obsessed with reminding us that “they’re just like us” but with access to much more money, power, and influence. I understand why it’s become a marketing technique for young stars, especially women like Jennifer Lawrence, Anna Kendrick, or Taylor Swift who are often criticized by fellow women attempting to distance themselves from the stereotypically feminine.

But all the reminders that they eat pizza and stay up late watching Netflix can become disingenuous, and Day ventures into this territory in the opening of her book, which evolved from speeches she wrote about her YouTube channel Geek & Sundry. She establishes who she is and why she’s writing a memoir in the first place, convincing those perusing the opening pages in Barnes & Noble or on Amazon to buy the book, which is good business but can be disorienting for those self-identified geeks opening their pre-ordered, signed copy.

My skepticism faded, however, as Day pushed past self-deprecating humor and delved into her her experiences with self-esteem, anxiety, depression, and physical illnesses. For fans who had no clue she was struggling, her honesty about these issues and how they affect her creative work is both surprising and empowering. Mental health issues are rarely addressed by public figures with such candor, even by younger celebrities who spend more time on social media with their fans.

The depth and vulnerability in the later chapters of the book is not consistent throughout, however, and there are certain events well-known by her fans that are conspicuously absent from the timeline she lays out, like her work on Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and other successes that pre-date/co-occur with the success of The Guild. Those holes are easy enough to fill with Wikipedia pages, but do add to the impression early-on that she’s maintaining a persona through her book.

Her gratitude towards her fans and fellow nerds, however, and her continued passion about her work shine through and make reading her memoir a pleasure. She also puts a face and set of personal experiences to an idea that I think many nerds hold dear to their heart: what happens online is just as ‘real’ as what happens away from our computers. While certain virtual experiences of hers (like her gaming addiction) negatively affected her life, her connection to gaming provided relationships and growth that shaped her as a person and allowed her to create projects that others relate to, like The Guild.

the guild

In turn, this connected her to more and more people, fans and industry folks alike, allowing her to continue carving space for nuanced female characters and more complex analysis of online life in pop culture. Day’s frustrations with the stereotypes faced by women working in entertainment or participating in nerd culture, while not the first of their kind, add meaning to the roles she’s written and helped in creating. She also touches on how fame and other people’s expectations can devastate the creative process, and how Gamergate affected her personal and professional lives.

Looking forward, it would be great to see Day talk more about race, sexual orientation, ability, and diversity in the geek world in her future writing and public speaking. The ‘democratic’ nature of the internet and of nerd culture is often explored in terms of representation of white women in media and gaming circles, rather than other areas of inequality. Since Day has taken stances against bullying and for embracing your ‘weird,’ using her voice to amplify the complexities of that issue and her channel to host content by nerds of all identities and backgrounds would be both refreshing and ground-breaking.

But this book, while about fairly unusual experiences, focuses on the delight we feel when we find something we’re passionate about as well as the contributions the highs and lows of our lives make to our identity and our work. That’s something everyone can identify with in some way, and makes it a worthwhile read for ‘nerds’ of all types…and the embarrassing childhood photos of Day scattered throughout don’t hurt either.

What did you think of You’re Never Weird on the Internet? How would you title your memoir? Let me know in the comments!

What I’m… Wednesday: Mike and Max

What I’m Watching

I’m a little late to the party, but Sunday I saw Magic Mike XXL and damn if that wasn’t the most delightful experience! I’m sure they were making some of the ‘progressive’ choices based on what they thought would make the most money, but the fact that they catered to/represented bisexual women, women of color, gay men, and people with different body sizes and types was so refreshing to me. I also loved the dialogue throughout the movie about all that women deal with and how important it is to ask them what they want. Of course, the many talented and attractive dancers didn’t hurt either. This movie certainly didn’t have a strong plot or the same levity as the first Magic Mike film, but it was incredibly enjoyable.

What I’m Playing

life is strange ep 4 title screen

In case you haven’t heard me screaming it from the rooftops, LIFE IS STRANGE EPISODE 4 CAME OUT YESTERDAY!!! I have completed my first playthrough and I am excited to do some critical thinking and writing about it, but for now I’m still kind of processing how I feel about what transpired. I can say this episode is fast-paced and dark–darker than any previous installment–and many aspects of the game this time around felt more emotionally meaningful to me, whether a choice the player had to make, a line of dialogue, or an item or location in the game. I find it difficult to successfully theorize about single episodes when the season or series they belong to hasn’t finished yet, but I promise there is more to come from this blog on my favorite episodic game to date.

What I’m Listening To

Lately I’ve been listening to a lot of covers. It’s always interested me how songs change when another artist performs them, and many of my favorite arrangements of songs are not the original versions. Of course, sometimes covers cannot be found on music streaming services like Google Play or Spotify, so please enjoy this YouTube playlist curated by yours truly.

Thanks for reading! What did you guys think about Episode 4? What is your favorite cover of a song? Let me know in the comments below!

On Ian Danskin’s Theory Part 2: Where Do We Go From Here?

On Wednesday I talked about the first three videos in Innuendo Studios’ six-part series Why Are You So Angry?, which explores where online harassment and movements like Gamergate come from. The last three videos touch on how we can try to reframe our own thinking about morality and social justice.

It can feel overwhelming to imagine solutions to issues as big as these, but keeping some simple things in mind helps. As Danskin and Sarkeesian (and I and many others state): consuming problematic media doesn’t make us bad. Creating it doesn’t make us bad. Even becoming an AJ doesn’t make us irrevocably bad. We always have the power to change our beliefs and our behaviors, or to reconsider how they affect us and others.

By change I don’t mean stop playing your favorite video games or stop eating meat or stop existing as a privileged person. Simply acknowledging that the things we say, do, and enjoy are affected by society and have the capacity to reflect social problems/affect others is an important step that validates oppressed group’s experiences..

anita quote

Of course this can’t totally solve the problem. We can’t control another person’s choices, or force them to confront their own privilege. But we can control our own behaviors and hold others accountable for theirs.

So what can we ‘privileged few’ do to deal with our discomfort and make healthy choices for ourselves and others? What can we do to make it clear that harassment is not okay and that AJs are not welcome in our community?

Danskin still isn’t 100% sure on this, and I’d say most people are in the same boat. But through a conversation with the experts – women affected by GG like Zoe Quinn and Lindsay Ellis – and his own rumination, he came up with some tentative suggestions which I have expanded upon to create my own (incomplete) list:

First of all, we can try to stop thinking in absolutes. Binarism makes the world easier, especially for people with privilege.I think Danskin is right that puritanical and binary thinking are Western concepts, and not just that, but colonial concepts used to empower some while oppressing others. If everything is cut and dry, one or the other, we get out of grappling with nuance and the feelings it brings up in us.

source: Yael Megery - Pikiwiki Israel

source: Yael Megery – Pikiwiki Israel

Second, we can try to look at the big picture, which means beyond ourselves. This is hard, because being selfish allows humans to survive. Some would argue that it is the natural and primary instinct, and that humans do not do anything without some kind of personal benefit. With that argument, I wholeheartedly disagree, but that is another post for another blog. When I say look at the big picture, I mean examine how media and social norms shape our current beliefs and, when making a choice about our actions or attitudes, ask how it affects other people who don’t have our privileges?

Along these lines, we can practice compassion towards ourselves. Much of the anger and hatred and violence turned towards cultural critics or so-called SJWs – especially female, trans, disabled, queer, and black and brown folks from those categories – comes from a sense of entitlement we get from society, but another chunk of it is a deflection of the anger or disappointment we feel towards ourselves for not being what we define as ‘good,’ for not seeing our own privilege or having it at all.

If we allow ourselves to be flawed human beings who sometimes make bad choices or miss things, but are not inherently or permanently bad, then we stop feeling the need to attack others who make us uncomfortable. Instead, we learn to cope with those feelings and show ourselves the understanding we might show a friend.

jay smooth quote

Once we show that compassion to ourselves and others, we’re able to continue watching and reading and playing the things we loved before, but also to be critical of them and help make them better.

When faced with others who choose not to acknowledge privilege, and worse, to attack those who do we can react to them in a variety of ways depending on our connection with them. If we are their close friend or family member, we can call them out and ask them to stop, or we can ask a mentor they respect to call them out.

This, as Ellis and Quinn told Danskin in their recent Twitter conversation, is really the only way to plant any seeds of change in an individual. They have to be hear it from someone they respect and be ready and willing to stop toxic behaviors.

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source: Innuendo Studios

We can also talk about privilege (and choice and social justice and popular culture in general) on our own platforms, to allow those who are open to listen and learn in a safe space, away from conspiracy theories, threats, or attacks. This helps minimize negative effects on bystanders doing similar work or affected by the issue when we speak out.

And last, we can demand good moderation in our communities, and expel people who choose to put our safety at risk. While education can be an important step towards change for AJ, it is not the responsibility of Sarkeesian or the other people he attacks to educate him. It’s best if he can take initiative himself, but if he won’t, people close to him who also have privilege have the best chance of pushing him along the path.

So those are my thoughts on Ian Danskin’s thoughts on AJ’s thoughts on Anita Sarkeesian. Whew, that’s a mouthful! How do you guys deal with nuanced issues in your day to day life? What are the best ways we can foster critical conversations? Let me know in the comments.

On Ian Danskin’s Theory Part 1: Why We’re All So Angry

Recently, Ian Danskin of Innuendo Studios released a lovely, easily digestible video series about cultural criticism, harassment, and privilege. It was super thought-provoking, so I want to showcase and engage with his argument here. In this first piece, we’ll look at his first three videos and talk about what I think he gets wrong.

On the ‘About’ page of this blog, I talk a little bit about my tongue-in-cheek url and my drive to analyze the pieces of pop culture I love. I started this project because media we consume both shapes us and is shaped by us. The people I promote on this blog and my YouTube channel share these beliefs, and one of those people is Anita Sarkeesian.

If you haven’t yet heard of her, I’m a little concerned that you haven’t been on the internet in five years, but don’t worry–Danskin gives a great summary of her work and the backlash to it in his new videos.

Danskin’s central question is why do cultural critics like Sarkeesian receive not just floods of counter-arguments but also personal attacks against them ranging from ridiculous to terrifying? And why do some of those attackers join together to form movements like Gamergate? In essence, why are people so angry?

As a shorthand, he calls the people attacking Sarkeesian ‘Angry Jack’ or as I’ll call him ‘AJ.’ AJ is typically one or more of the following: white, male, straight, cis, and middle/upper class. This allows him to see the world at its most ideal: a world where he is not judged based on his gender, the color of his skin, his sexuality, the abilities of his body, the state of his mental health, or his wealth or class status. A world where he is an individual and defined by his individual actions.

credit: Amanda Watkins

Angry Jack, credit: Amanda Watkins

When someone says something like “I’m vegan,” or “I don’t drink,” or “that game is sexist,” it forces AJ to look at the world in a different way, to wonder whether doing or liking the things this person doesn’t do/like makes HIM a bad person. As Danskin points out, this is a complex question, but I’ll do my best to outline what we have to consider.

First things first, the value of a human being is inherent and does not come from their accomplishments or even their individual choices in isolation. Second things second, of course, we are all responsible for our own behaviors and accountable for the consequences of those behaviors. Behaviors can affect others and society at large.

Growing up, most of us believed what we saw and what we were told without questioning it. It would be exhausting to debate every single decision we made or belief we adopted, and the beliefs our society extolled are already long-established, so we accepted them as fact upon hearing of them and moved on.

source: Wikipedia

source: Wikipedia

That means that if/when we’re forced to question them, we’re questioning not just our beliefs at that moment, but an entire lifetime of attitudes and actions. And if we forget for a moment that what is up for debate is not our character as an individual, not our intentions, but the society we live in and how our attitudes and actions affect everyone, then that means we could believe we’ve been not just wrong but ‘bad’ for a long time. And that might make us feel judged for the groups we belong to or the things we enjoy rather than our character.

On all of this, Danskin and I agree, but I do think he gets one thing wrong in his argument; he posits that the AJs of the world feel this way but are hangers-on who go along with the real ‘bad guys.’ He contrasts them with ‘psychopaths’ who threaten and dox people they disagree with for no good reason. I don’t think that’s the case. First of all, as one of his viewers/followers pointed out, it is ableist to blame harmful behavior on mental illness or say that all psychopathic or sociopathic people will behave harmfully. But it’s also just plain not true.

The sad fact of the matter is, the abusers and rapists he uses as foils to online harassers in his videos are not the exceptions. They are parents and siblings and friends. They are humans. As are online harassers in communities like GG. That’s why things like rape culture and toxic gaming culture exist–those acts have the power of social norms and hierarchies behind them.

Credit: Chase Carter

Credit: Chase Carter

In the most benign of forms, AJ dismisses rather than engages with privilege. He resorts to derailment in the name of things like ‘journalism ethics.’ He posits that he and his fellow AJs are a ‘minority’ who deserves to speak, or that he is engaging in an ‘intellectual debate’ with two equally valid sides. He is Taylor Swift tweeting to Nicki Minaj about the VMAs.

At his most dangerous, the same AJ is violent and abusive. He uses hate speech to scare people who speak up about issues they care about. He makes an online game where people can punch Sarkeesian in the face. He is Redditors sending death threats to former CEO Ellen Pao.

Danskin points out that many people believe that harassers are gonna harass no matter what. But that isn’t exactly true. Harassment is a choice, a reaction to discomfort, to anger and disappointment and doubt that previously didn’t exist, that makes it harder to continue living the way we always had until someone like Sarkeesian spoke up. Those who bring social issues to AJ’s attention and spark this discomfort become symbols of the destruction of ease and innocence in AJ’s life, so to cope he chooses to lash out at them.

source: City of Renton website

source: City of Renton website

Many AJs have most grown up seeing gaming as a safe space for them, an area of culture where they can go to escape their personal disappointments. This helps explain, but not excuse, why someone like AJ might attack someone like Sarkeesian, who asks him to examine games and how they affect others. To him, this means he has to question himself, which is a scary, difficult, and – if we’re honest – life-long process.

It’s much easier to deflect. Danskin says that AJ is less a type of person and more the mindset we enter when we are faced with our privilege and enter defend-and-attack mode. I agree that every person with privilege, at one point in another in their lives, feels uncomfortable about taking advantage of privilege or having it at all says about their character. We privileged few each have the ability to become an AJ.

But that reaction is a choice. To avoid becoming one, we have to develop alternative reactions, new coping mechanisms. We have to recognize that a) it’s okay to feel discomfort but b) the social issues being exposed are bigger than our individual discomfort and therefore c) the debate at hand isn’t actually about our morality at all.

Thanks for reading! On Saturday we’ll talk about how we can create just online spaces and hold ourselves and others accountable. In the meantime, let me know your thoughts, like what do you think of Danskin’s videos? Where does harassment come from? Why do I get so defensive when someone says they don’t drink soda?

What’s In a Name? Part 3: Conclusion – Thematic Analysis of Her Story

SPOILER ALERT: this series contains plot details for the game.

If you haven’t seen them yet, check out Part 1 and Part 2 of this series now.

In case you have no idea what’s going on, this is the third and final installment of WIAN, my analysis of the game Her Story. So far, we’ve talked about the title of the game, the names of the main characters, and their sisterly relationship. In addition to Hannah and Eve, many other characters in the game share names with figures from history or mythology, which is what I want to look as we wrap up today. Watch the video below or keep reading for more.

Florence, the midwife who steals and raises Eve, shows similarities to Florence Nightingale, a nurse during the Crimean War who also had an interest in writing.

Simon is the name of the apostle later called Peter in the New Testament.The name Simon means “he has heard,” and in the end his character doesn’t just bear witness to Hannah and Eve’s story, his death allows it to be shared.

When Hannah gets pregnant, Simon wants to name the baby ‘Ava,’ but Hannah refuses. She doesn’t want her daughter to have a symmetrical name and be plagued by the same issues of identity and reflection as she and her sister were. She wants to name the baby Sarah, another biblical name.

source: Good Reads

source: Good Reads

The Orson Scott Card novel Sarah describes the events that befall Abraham and Sarah in Genesis from Sarah’s point of view, expanding the few sentences they get in the bible to 300 pages. Eve’s interviews do a similar thing for her life and that of her sister.

After the events of the game, Eve’s child is named Sarah, as we know from the chat messages that appear on the database computer. The player watches the videos alongside Sarah, to learn ‘why her mother did what she did.’

Reflection, Representation, and Storytelling

In her interviews, Eve often connects her life to fairy tales she read in books growing up. She even calls her final interview ‘a real life fairy tale.’ For her, growing up across the road from Hannah, Hannah’s life was what hers was supposed to look like, what she read about in books. So she cut her hair like Hannah’s, moved like Hannah, and eventually lived not just with Hannah, but as Hannah.

Many women feel compelled to look, dress, and act like the characters they learn about as children, the women they see on television or in movies. They are princesses or evil witches, good or bad seeds, and they provide archetypes after which girls are expected to model their own lives. Girls are set up to compete with their sisters to be the prettier or more likeable one, to perform womanhood more perfectly, because only then can they receive their fairy tale ending or their blessing from God.

source: Wikimedia Commons

source: Wikimedia Commons

These ideas of what makes someone a successful girl, what makes them the hero of their own story, are passed down from generation to generation in stories we tell and books we read. We learn them from such a young age that it can be difficult to remember they’re only stories

As time went on, both Hannah and Eve realized that aspects of living as one person didn’t feel good. That it limited them, made it difficult for each to be her authentic self. When Eve finally lets go of being one with Hannah, she embraces her individuality, getting a tattoo and wearing a wig. And when she is ‘herself,’ the man she’d always fawned over falls in love with her, separately from the character she played, and gives her the baby she’d longed for when her sister was pregnant.

Hannah is understandably angry at this turn of events. She was taught that acting a certain way would deliver her happiness and then found out that wasn’t true. She lashes out, and although she may not have intended to, she kills Simon.

source: Sam Barlow

source: Sam Barlow

But Eve doesn’t condemn Hannah or blame her. She protects her because in the end, neither of them is a ‘villain’ or a ‘damsel,’ and they aren’t in competition with one another. By telling her story, Eve liberates not just herself, but also her sister and her daughter, from these boxes. As Eve is giving her last interview to the detectives, Hannah is escaping the police and her past.

Each of the women in the story sheds the skin of her namesake and embraces her flawed, fully realized self. And as we play the game, we learn to let go of a little bit of our own preconceptions. To question the stories we tell ourselves.

Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this analysis, you might like my review of GTFO The Movie or my analysis of the Mass Effect Trilogy.

What’s In a Name? Part 2: Hannah and Sisterhood – Thematic Analysis of Her Story

SPOILER ALERT: this series contains plot details for the game. 

On Sunday I published Part 1 of my three-part mini-series on Her Story, which focused on the meaning behind the title of the game and Eve’s name. Like Eve, Hannah shares much with her biblical namesake, but has a critically different fate in the game. To hear more, watch the video below or keep reading.

Hannah

In Judeo-Christian mythology, Hannah is Elkanah’s first wife of two and his favorite, but she doesn’t give him children. This upsets her, so she prays to God for a child and eventually is blessed by Eli the High Priest with six.

In Her Story, Hannah falls in love with Simon first and doesn’t want to share him with Eve. She marries him and gets pregnant by him, but has a miscarriage which renders her infertile. Yet she never receives a blessing, never bears him a child, and never lives the story book life that sat just out of reach for so many years.

Sisterhood and Rivalry

Throughout the game, we hear of times that Hannah resented Eve. She once held her head underwater, considering drowning her before relenting and letting her breathe. Another time, she hit her ‘harder than she needed to’ when imitating a bruise she got because of Eve’s actions. It’s even suggested that she tried to kill Eve before she was born, that Eve was never supposed to make it into the world. The song Eve plays for the detectives further underlines this ambivalent relationship.

In ‘The [Dreadful] Wind and the Rain,’ the older sister drowns the younger, prettier one because the man she loves is more infatuated with her. The younger sister is described as having long yellow hair. Since Eve wears a blonde wig when she performs as a musician, and is the one whose pregnancy is successful and who Simon eventually ‘chooses,’ she can be read as the younger sister in the song. But instead of having her story told by a fiddle made of her body, Eve tells her story herself.

In the Bible and the song Hannah’s ‘character’ competes with other women for a man’s affection. But unlike in those stories, in Her Story (as in the mini-game in the recycle bin) ‘Player Two’ or Eve ‘wins.’ The game offers an alternative to the cultural mythology about femininity and the role of women in society: maybe obedient, shy, and innocent is not the natural or only way to be. Eve is gnostic, confident, and even a little reckless but she still wins Simon’s heart, and is not the person who kills him. Of course, in the end the sisterhood is not really a rivalry at all. Instead, Eve’s acceptance of her individuality gives each woman freedom; the autonomy to tell her own story.

her story artwork

Thanks for reading! Share your theories in the comments and keep your eyes peeled for Part 3 of this analysis. Part 3 is here!


What’s In a Name? Part 1: Herstory and Eve – Thematic Analysis of Her Story

Warning: this series contains HEAVY SPOILERS for the game. If you don’t want to know who killed Simon, get outta here while you still can!

Disclaimer: my interpretation of the game is based on Hannah and Eve being twin sisters, not two personalities in the same body. #sorrynotsorry

You may remember from last week that one of my favorite Let’s Play channels, Geek Remix, recently played Her Story. After watching a few minutes of gameplay, I knew I wanted in on this, and I can tell you the game doesn’t disappoint. A non-linear, story-based game, the player combs through interview footage of Hannah Smith from a police investigation into the death of her husband Simon. The videos are archived based on their transcripts, so searching any keyword will bring up clips where the term is used. (When you begin, the first suggestion is ‘murder.’)

Written by Sam Barlow, the same person who brought us Silent Hill: Shattered Memories, the game conjures a similar mood and aesthetic while doing something that feels very new. It handles theme, allusion, and symbolism so well that I decided to write a three-part analysis of the names used in the game. Woo! Watch the video below, or read on for more.

Let’s start with the title, shall we?

Herstory

‘Herstory’ is history told from the feminist perspective, a reaction to male-dominated accounts of past events, many of which do not acknowledge the differing experiences of women or the patriarchal values society held at that time.

While the term ‘herstory’ has many connotations depending on its context, at its core it refers to a woman’s side of the story, which is a particularly apt way to refer to the game’s account of Simon’s death. By alluding to and then subverting traditional historical and mythological tales, Her Story allows its female characters to speak for themselves and tells a different, more explicit and nuanced story of female persistence, survival, and ultimately freedom.

Eve

Of course, the title is not the only meaningful name in the story. Almost every character’s name is biblically, historically, or mythologically significant in some way. The most obvious connection the game makes to the Hebrew Bible is Eve, Hannah’s twin sister. She has a tattoo of a serpent wrapped around an apple, a clear reference to Adam’s wife and the first woman created by God, who ate fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil and shared it with her husband. Her name means ‘living’ or ‘life source.’

Hannah’s sister Eve is obviously not the first human woman in existence in the universe of Her Story, but she seems to be the first person the detectives interview about Simon (although they believe she is Hannah at the time). As in the Bible, Eve discovers and disseminates knowledge of ‘good and evil,’ or in this case, of the twins lives and who is guilty of Simon’s murder. But the Biblical Eve is commonly perceived as an emblem of female weakness and the evils of temptation and knowledge, and our Eve is not so cut and dry.

It’s never made clear whether Eve was responsible for the deaths around her (Florence, the twins’ parents, and maybe even Hannah’s baby), whether they were prompted by knowledge that Hannah, and then later the detectives, did not have: the knowledge that Eve and Hannah are sisters. But we do know Eve did not murder Simon and is not expelled from her paradise because of her pursuit of knowledge.

In fact her curiosity allows her to escape her physical confinement by Florence and later by Hannah. Telling her story allows her to exist as an individual in a way she never could before, and to be acknowledged not just by the detectives, but by anyone who views her interviews. Her Story subverts the traditional narrative by allowing Eve’s side of the story to be heard and shared.

her story

First time posting in-depth analysis or making a video! What do you think? Would you like more of this? What interested you most about Her Story? Let me know in the comments!

Part 2 of this series is up now! Check it out!

Review: GTFO The Movie

I’d been intrigued by GTFO: The Movie, Shannon Sun-Higginson’s indie documentary about sexist harassment in gaming culture, since I learned about it at South by Southwest in March of 2015. Of course, I didn’t sell my soul for a SXSW film festival pass, so I wasn’t able to catch it when it was in town, but it finally went up on Vimeo, iTunes, and the like and now that I’ve seen it I can say with confidence that it was worth the wait. As a woman who plays video games, it didn’t necessarily tell me something I couldn’t have imagined or guessed at before, but it built the perfect spring-board for a continued conversation about misogyny, media, and society.

 

In the film, journalist and gamer Maddy Myers, Dragon Age writer Jennifer Brandes Hepler, activist and cultural critic Anita Sarkeesian, and an array of other women from the gaming world shared how they fit into it and when things went terribly wrong for each of them (i.e. online harassment, discrimination, and even rape and death threats). While the women themselves often told their stories with a wry smile, seeing and hearing the explicit, horrific messages sent their way was incredibly uncomfortable and scary. But that’s not the sole focus of the film. The movie examined several aspects of the game industry including marketing, character-design, multi-player online games, and competitive gaming. It also delved in-depth into two major events in recent gaming history: Capcom’s reality show Cross Assault, and the #Gamergate controversy (the latter of which seemed like a last-minute addition, but more on that later).

source: Shannon Sun-Hugginson / GTFO The Movie

source: Shannon Sun-Hugginson / GTFO The Movie

The film touched on a lot of things I myself think about on an almost daily basis, like what it means to make gaming an integral part of your identity or how to go about changing a toxic culture. What I really appreciated about it, though, was that it broke down a few stereotypes about gaming along the way, including:

If You Play Your Cards Right, You’re Safe

People often believe that the only gamers being harassed are the women who ‘flaunt’ their gender or otherwise invite criticism. But I think Todd Harper, author of The Culture of Digital Fighting Games and another voice in the film, said it best when describing Miranda Pakozdi’s reaction to her time on Cross Assault. He believes women who play games are given two unappealing choices: they either don’t point out the harassment they/their peers experience in order to protect themselves and to continue doing something they love, or they speak up and at best, receive backlash, but at worst, are isolated from their own community. There’s really no ‘safe’ option for girl gamers.

Harassment Comes From Anonymity

Again, the film’s examination of Cross Assault does a great job of debunking this myth. The fact that Aris Bakhtanians felt comfortable touching, smelling, ogleing, and heckling Miranda on camera and telling a reporter point blank that “sexual harassment is part of [fighting game] culture” shows that anonymity is not what produces this behavior. Rather, it’s a set of beliefs. Of course Aris, and the folks involved in Gamergate, are not the only people whose actions and attitudes are harmful to women, and these beliefs didn’t appear out of thin air. Which brings me to the last, and in my opinion, most important point…

Gaming is More Sexist Than X

Many people outside of the gaming community perceive the video game industry to be somehow more misogynistic or more toxic than the rest of the world, or to be at fault for sexist behavior. But as Harper and Sarkeesian point out, gaming doesn’t exist in a vacuum. It’s a form of media just like television, film, or music and it reflects the same attitudes we carry into all aspects of our day-to-day lives. That the rest of society seems eager to look to games as a cause of misogyny, or to call it out without examining other media, is willfully short-sighted and a point of contention among many gamers.

While the film isn’t exactly polished – shots are reused, quality varies from scene to scene, and the Gamergate montage was clearly added after the rightful end of the film, delivering a somewhat jarring/dissatisfying close – the ideas it explores are integral to the understanding of gaming culture and how it fits into the greater context and history of sexism; the animation and score are enjoyable; and director Shannon Sun-Higginson rightly continues the conversation online.

Have you watched the movie? What were your thoughts? Share them below, or find out where you can watch here.